


Do you still like me?

by kieren_Freaking_Walker



Category: In the Flesh (TV)
Genre: Emotionally constipated Simon Monroe, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Gen, Jeez, M/M, sort yourselves out boys
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-01-10
Updated: 2015-01-10
Packaged: 2018-03-04 00:17:48
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,081
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2901038
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kieren_Freaking_Walker/pseuds/kieren_Freaking_Walker
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Despite both of them spending most of their time in the Bungalow, neither Simon nor Kieren have initiated anything, not even a kiss, since Amy Dyer's death.<br/>Kieren wonders whether Simon still has feelings for him. With the unknown distance between them, Kieren hasn't told Simon about the shaking and nosebleeds.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Do you still like me?

Kieren was sitting in the living room of the bungalow, reading one of Simon's poetry books, when he felt the familiar trickle of black goo from his nose. He reached up and clamped his fingers over his nose to plug it.  
He dropped the book back onto the table and hurried to the bathroom, to grab some toilet paper. On his way he noticed the door to Amy's bedroom was slighting ajar.  
Odd, because it had been closed since...

  
Kieren continued on and grabbed the toilet paper, holding it to his nose in an attempt to stop what could for all intents and purposes be considered a nose bleed, only Kieren couldn't bleed.  
Kieren was dead. It had to be something else.  
Kieren whined lowly as he leaned over the sink. He was pretty worried, and hadn't told anyone about his decline in health. The one person he  _wanted_ to tell seemed pretty withdrawn from him lately.  
  
When the bleeding stopped Kieren flushed the toilet paper down the sink, and returned to Amy's bedroom door as quietly as he could.  
He peeked in through the crack and saw Simon.  
  
Simon Monroe was sitting in the middle of Amy Dyer's bed, hugging one of her pillows to his chest, his head hung and bobbing a little every now and again. Kieren realised by the slow even breathing, that Simon was actually asleep.  
He pushed the door open very carefully and knelt down by Simon, shaking him gently to rouse him "Simon? Come on...You can't do this to yourself..."  
  
Simon mumbled something intelligible, and blinked down at Kieren for a few moments, before uncrossing his legs and holding a hand out to Kieren.  
  
Kieren led him to his bedroom, and pulled the blankets back so Simon could climb in "You need sleep. Come on." He whispered, tugging the sleepy Simon by the wrist. He took the pillow from his other hand before allowing him to climb under the blankets, and turned to leave when he was sure Simon was settled in.

"Thank you..." Simon choked out, voice rough from disuse.

Kieren paused in the doorway, and glanced back over his shoulder, before shaking his head and returning the pillow to Amy's bedroom, but not before he hugged it himself, and breathed in the perfume of the friend he missed more than he would admit. Amy was gone, and with her, a piece of himself.

* * *

 

"Kieren?"

Kieren sat up, blinking around blearily. Oh, he'd fallen asleep on the sofa again.   
The hand that was on his shoulder quickly disappeared, and Simon moved back considerably as he frowned at Kieren. "What? You okay?" Kieren mumbled groggily.  
  
"I was going to ask you the same thing...you were crying out in your sleep..." Simon said quietly, looking a little like he thought he shouldn't have intruded "I wanted to make sure you were alright--" He added quickly, his fingers drumming a nervous little rhythm on his knees.

Kieren blinked at him, silent for a long moment, before reaching up to rub at his own head "I...I don't remember what I was dreaming about..." He admitted quietly, propping himself up on an elbow now "I'm okay...I guess."  
  
Simon didn't look convinced. He frowned at Kieren even harder now, but the expression quickly changed to something more like fear "Kieren--"  
  
Kieren reached up, having felt the trickle of black goo, and clamped his fingers over his nose "--It's okay! It happens." Kieren tried to assure him as he struggled to get up.  
  
Simon pushed him back down firmly, and grabbed the box of tissues from the coffee table, offering them to Kieren with fear in his eyes "It's not  _supposed_ to happen...how long has this been going on, Kier?" His voice was strained, and it made Kieren look up from the tissue box.

That was the first time Simon had used his nickname. "A little more than a week? Since...Amy." Kieren said quietly, and noticed the fall of Simon's shoulders. He didn't want to upset Simon. This was  _his_ problem...he could handle it himself, right?  
  
"Why didn't you tell me?  _Kieren_ \--"

"I figured you had enough on your plate...I mean you haven't exactly been paying any real attention to me anyway..."

"I wanted to give you space..."

"Me? Yourself, you mean..." Kieren's tone came out harsher than he had intended

Simon's face fell at that remark, and swallowed thickly before shaking his head "No--I thought--" He looked down at his drumming fingers "--I saw you at the funeral...I mean...you  _painted her coffin_ , for fuck sake...I figured  _you_  wanted some space, to grieve her...We both lost someone...but you knew her better than me."

"I needed you." Kieren said bluntly, all the feelings he had been holding in were slowly rising to the surface "I needed someone to tell me that it'd be okay, to hold me and kiss me and wait it out with me...but you weren't there..." 

Simon didn't look up from his hands, but he seemed to shrink in on himself slightly at that.

"Do you still like me, Simon? If not, it's alright...I'll stop hanging around the bungalow...I'll go home and--"  
  
Kieren was stopped by a hand over his, the one that wasn't holding tissues to his nose, and he met Kieren's eyes. Kieren couldn't read them, one of the disadvantages of dead and clouded eyes. "Of course I still like you, Kieren...I just...I'm sorry. I assumed you wanted space..."  
  
Kieren let out a breath he hadn't known he was holding (not that he needed breath, but old habits die hard, really) and threw his wad of tissues into the bin beside the sofa before sitting up and grabbing both of Simon's restless hands in his "Don't assume things next time...please just ask me, alright?"

Simon nodded, and smiled sadly "Can you forgive me? I'm...I'm sorry I wasn't there..."

"What's to forgive?" Kieren looked over towards the clock and startled. It was nearly 9pm "Oh shit...I've missed dinner--I need to get back home before--"

"Stay."

Kieren blinked at Simon in disbelief "What? What do you mean?"

Simon rolled his eyes and took Kieren's hand carefully, as if he were expecting it to be ripped away from him "Don't go home. Stay. Stay here with me..."  
His voice was so quiet, Kieren had to strain to hear it. Simon was afraid Kieren would refuse.

"O-okay..."

**Author's Note:**

> more to come


End file.
